Quote of the Day:
“Good time for a reminder that it is still extremely fucking early and everyone needs to chill.”
— Ashley Feinberg, HuffPost, in response to a bunch of stats about where previous campaigns were at this time in past years.
Mood: “I wish people would give me spoilers on my own life.”
— Emily Nussbuam, TV Critic for The New Yorker.
Separated at Birth: WaPo‘s Dana Milbank
“You can’t unsee Dana Milbank’s new byline photo.” — Eddie Scarry, commentary writer, Washington Examiner. Scarry says Milbank looks like a cross between Inside the Actor’s Studio James Lipton and a fat Steven Segal.
GET POPCORN AND WATCH THESE REPORTERS FIGHT!
The premise of the fight: A story in The Daily Beast by Maxi Tani and Andrew Kirell about an exchange that happened at Fox News. The story was published Friday. The fight transpired on Monday.
Who started it? Well, this specific exchange was started by FNC’s Doug McKelway, who antagonized Kirell on Twitter. Clearly The Daily Beast story set McElway off. McKelway went back and found a January video from Kirell in which Kirell is singing while playing the guitar and harmonica and commented on it.
Who won? I’m going with Kirell. McKelway has a disturbing bit about Kirell’s harmonica playing sounding like something being shoved into a near corpse in hospice care. Who wants to read about that?
Really proud of this “Little Bird” video from the middle of the desert. A bird flew through the shot at the exact right time, and so I thank that bird. https://t.co/AW7CSQCj7U
— Andrew Kirell (@AndrewKirell) January 10, 2019
McKelway: Andrew, Andrew, Andrew. Really? You’re proud of this? Tell you what. I’ll give you a free guitar lesson if you report that Joe Biden voted to re-instate Robert E. Lee’s citizenship. I’ll even throw in a harmonica lesson. I don’t play, but from available evidence, neither do you.
Kirell: Wow, Doug. You seem like a miserable person—bitter enough to go and find something unrelated to you to trash-talk. I’m well-aware of Biden’s checkered past on the topic. Doesn’t erase how damning your emails were.
Kirell: If you want lessons in reporting, btw, I’m happy to offer those. That is something you seem to need some help with—despite your title. Not a great look to lash out personally at someone reporting about a professional spat, bud.
McKelway: And the harmonica? I’ve seen it played better as a defacto heart monitor shoved into the gaping, dentureless maw of a near corpse in hospice care. In and out and in and out until it stops. But yours never stops.
Kirell: Are you OK, Doug? Seriously. You sound like you need some help. Lashing out on Twitter because people reported about your reporting? Yikes, man. I really hope you find solace.
McKelway: How bout your guitar playing?
Kirell: Wow you’re still going. This is pathetic, my man. Hope you get the help you need.
Michael Avenatti gets served (sort of)
“As @MichaelAvenatti left Orange County federal court a woman threw lawsuit papers at his feet, and said ‘you have been served.’ Avenatti said nothing— walked briskly to a waiting minivan.@KNX1070” — Craig Fiegener, reporter, KNX1070, Los Angeles.
“Rosie O’Donnell’s farts are causing global warming.” — Mark Dice, YouTuber, creator of high-pitched CNN Brian Stelter voiceovers.
Rep. Eric Swalwell bleached his hair in high school
“A few things you may not know about me: 1) I can think of one nice thing to say about Donald Trump 2) I’m a country music Democrat 3) I had spiked, bleached hair in high school 4) I’m going to get rid of Mitch McConnell.” — Rep. Eric Swalwell (D-), presidential hopeful.
“So this morning I told the guy in the aisle seat that I was a journalist. He said, ‘oh, so you’re a socialist.’ I tried to see if he was kidding, but he just stared back at me, so I turned away and looked out the window. Then he got started.” — Eva Holland, correspondent, Outside Mag. She’s based in the Yukon Territory.
“Obviously Biden’s bounce is the big news in the several polls out this morning but some other themes too:
* Mayyyybe a little momentum for Warren?
* Pretty bad numbers for Bernie. Polling in the mid-teens with 100% name recognition is not very good.
* Buttigieg momentum slows?”
— Nate Silver, FiveThirtyEight.
Important Q for the masses: Can seltzer make you ‘fart?’
“Many of the zillion replies I’ve gotten today about how seltzer is bad have been about how it makes people fart, which I understand sounds like a causation that is true, but for myself is not. It does make me burp. There must be science on this. Does seltzer make you fart?” — Ben Dreyfuss, editorial director, Mother Jones.
Assholes try to take down Pete Buttigieg with fake sex scandal. The Daily Beast has the recording. Here.
HuffPost and New York Mag’s Yashar Ali remarked on the hoax, saying, “This is fucking disgusting.”
Kim Kardashian‘s baby shower for her fourth child has a theme: CBD and Meditation.
Larry King did not have a heart attack. Some publications reported that he did. (RELATED: No, Larry King Did Not Have A Heart Attack)
Anthony Weiner is shopping a book, interest is flaccid. Fresh out of prison, can he arouse interest? Here.
CNN political commentator Doug Heye tells The Mirror, “That would not be on my reading list. But in fairness, I would have said the same thing while he was still in Congress.”
Goodbye bikinis. Sports Illustrated features a woman in a burkini. Here.
SNL’s Pete Davidson bailed on gig after being “disrespected.” Here.
“Think I’m gone do a Q&A sometime this week. Stay tuned.” — LeBron James, player, LA Lakers.